Living With Grief

Monday…. Again

Déjà vu (noun): A feeling of having already experienced the present situation

I came on here to write a blog called “Mondays” and it turns out, I’ve already written one here. Oops.

I don’t know what it is about Mondays, but I struggle with them. Mondays tend to be my griefiest, most anxious, bluest day of the week. I think I’ve mentioned this previously – perhaps it’s the comedown after the weekend, perhaps it’s the quietness in the house working from home, perhaps it’s the fact that the work schedule is slow on Mondays – a previous counsellor suggested it might be because Summer died on a Monday (My Baby did too, come to think of it), so perhaps there’s some sort of muscle memory there. Whatever it is, Mondays officially suck.

To counter this, an amazing baby loss friend has taken to sending me an upbeat song, every Monday. The idea is so simple, yet genius, especially since my go-to musical preference tends to be ballads (i.e. “Alexa, play some acoustic pop!”) which is no use to anyone.

Upbeat music! Songs that you can’t help but smile to! Why didn’t I think of this?

I’m still pretty rubbish with tech (despite having a website, Lord knows how I’ve managed that one!), so I don’t know how to make this into a Spotify playlist or anything (I say that, like I even know how to use Spotify. It is an app? I dunno. Not something I have or make use of). So this is my primitive list of upbeat song recommendations and the accompanying YouTube links. You’re welcome 😉

To create this list, I reached out to the baby loss community and Mumoirs supporters, asking people which songs never failed to make them happy/smile. So for anyone else needing them today, here’s what people came back with. Enjoy and feel free to let me know of any others.

PS This blog should have been called “Happy Mondays” shouldn’t it? Missed a trick there (not that I can even think of any of their songs, mind!).

My new  “FORCE YOURSELF HAPPY” playlist, in collaboration with Mumoirs readers!

These two are my own starter suggestions:

Faith, George Michael This song makes me laugh. It reminds me of a time my brother was driving us to my mum’s house. We were nearly home, but stuck in traffic when this came on the radio. We started to do really stupid dance moves, getting sillier and sillier, copying each other and trying to make each other laugh, so that by the time the car started moving again, we were in hysterics and singing this song at the top of our lungs.

Top of The World, Imagine Dragons  In 2014, James and I went to two consecutive weddings: one in Paris on Saturday, the other in Madrid on Sunday, what a weekend! At both weddings, the bride and groom came into their wedding breakfast dancing to this song. It makes me think of those two couples and the pure joy of absolutely everyone there. I can’t help but smile!

These were my friend’s weekly recommendations:

Send Me on My Way, Rusted Root I adore the nonsensical bits of this one and who doesn’t LOVE being reminded of a childhood with Matilda?! My fave childhood book too.

Don’t Stop, Fleetwood Mac Awesome, awesome band, who we’ve seen live twice actually! We also had an awesome evening at Mick Fleetwood’s eponymous rooftop bar in Hawaii.

You’ve Got the Love, Florence and the Machine I think I’m right in saying that my father in law is a Florence fan and would agree with this one!

Lifted, Lighthouse Family This one always makes me smile. We were on a coach back from a wedding, with everyone belting out karaoke classics, when one of the biggest introverts we know, made a beeline for James to get him to do a Lighthouse Family duet with him. I loved that he had the confidence to do that, knowing James would happily sing along with him.

Some oldies but goodies from the baby loss community!

Karma Chameleon Great suggestion!

Dancing in the Dark, Bruce Springsteen …And always fun spying a young Courtney Cox!

Jump around,House of Pain Ha awesome, I dare you NOT to jump around while listening to this. Physically impossible. (Does this remind anyone else of Mrs Doubtfire?! Oh Daniel!)

I Feel Pretty, Westside City This one DOES make me laugh (especially if sung with an accent). Good shout!

Some more contemporary recommendations

Shake it off, Taylor Swift YES! How did I not think of this? Both mine and my goddaughter’s fave

Mr Brightside, The Killers Oh a transport-me-back-to-uni classic

Power, Little Mix The eclectic suggestions do make me laugh. My mother in law would appreciate this one, she’s a LM fan!

Temperature, Sean Paul This takes me back to being a teenager. Oh to be 18 again!

Party Rock Anthem, LMFAO I never would have thought of this one, but it’s a good shout! May have to add it to my running playlist

Bitter Sweet Symphony, The Verve Something for everyone!

And some new songs I’ve never heard before!

Awesome, thank you everyone for helping me with this. I hope it makes others smile too – especially if someone’s clever enough to make this into a real shareable playlist!

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